Struggling with silencing your mind when it goes wild in self-sabotage mode?
For some strange reason, when we receive negative signs from our body, we fully acknowledge them. But when it comes to negative thoughts? We tend to resist and often even shut down.
The universal signal your body uses to communicate with you when it hurts, is called pain. You stub your toe on the corner of the bed, it hurts. You pull a muscle from lifting a heavy object, oh how I have howled in pain for days. We feel it, it’s real.
But what’s the signal our minds use to communicate when it feels pain?
I refer to the mind as the “thing” in our heads that won’t stop talking. It drives your decisions, diminishes trust in your abilities, takes you down when presenting a deck in a meeting, weakens you when asking for a promotion or on an interview. And the list goes on and on….
The signal your mind sends to communicate that it is hurt is called fear. It’s the ugly little “F” word that many sweep under the rug because it’s so internal and automatic. It’s also not physical so you can’t show it to someone and ask for help to remove it. It’s deeply rooted and can trigger at any time, causing you to doubt yourself and your decision to act or not act. It convinces you, you didn’t truly earn your achievements a la the Imposter Syndrome and shouldn’t bother trying to advance in your career.
Unfortunately fear is also the very signal that silences your gut instinct and trust in yourself, preventing you from moving in a new direction or speaking up about something, for example.
Before I forget, I want to be sure you know about my audio leadership course (it’s free) that’s designed to help you own your authority in your career and it works. It’s based on two decades of leading in Corporate America, (I’m a former Wall St. Executive) and those professionals I coach here at In Our Shoes. Now onto addressing fear and eliminating negative self-talk…
How to Eliminate Negative Self-Talk
This week I invite you to imagine one outcome, you’d like to experience.
What’s the first thing that comes to mind, that you should do?
Now ask yourself, if there’s any fear or discomfort from doing that 1 thing?
Just notice what’s showing up for you. Embrace it. Observe it as the uninvited guest it is, who showed up for dinner. Allow versus resist. Let it wash over you and just feel the pain.
You’re not imagining it. It hurts just like your body feels pain. You don’t ever deny your body’s pain. You can’t, it’s just there. So, why try to deny the mind’s pain? It’s very much right there walking around with you like a 50-pound bag of luggage on your back.
Now make a commitment to step fully in and act IN SPITE of the pain.
What’s one thing you can do in that moment that feels aligned yet uncomfortable? Note: if it feels too easy, you’re probably not going gutsy enough. That’s how you begin chipping away at the psyche’s negative self-talk. It gets easier over time if you’re willing to observe and act on instinct – what you feel is the right best direction for you.
To your gutsy freedom and success.
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